Retrospect

I was cleaning out my emails and came across one sent on August 16, 2006 to Jilly, Kelly, and Ms. M. in response to them jokingly asking when Mark and I were going to get married (Mark and I had just signed papers for our house). After telling them they would for sure be invited when that day came - which still holds true! - I mentioned it's possible that when that day comes, I might prefer to elope:

...It's MY wedding, and I can elope if I want to! hahaha! Basically, I've seen way too many couples fight and end up practically hating each other over the planning of their wedding, and I hate to think they forgot the whole reason why they were getting married in the first place. I figure if you remove all that B.S., it's really just about the bride and the groom and is more special. I don't know, I guess I'll have to see what I do once it's before me, but for now, standing barefoot on a beach someplace with just me, Mark, and a minister sounds pretty blissful... :o)

I find it interesting that now that this is a reality, it's difficult for me to determine if eloping is indeed the best choice for us. Why is that? Am I just worried about making everyone else happy? Is it really just that I want to have everyone there to witness our union and that's why I'm so on the fence about this? Do you think my feelings about this before even having a ring on my finger are more indicative of my true, innate desires or is it just easy to say something like this when there aren't actual imminent plans?

I'm confused, kids. Granted, I was confused before I read this old email, but...