Shopping = Sucky

I'm a lady - of course, I use the term "lady" lightly here - and like any lady, I like to shop. As a matter of fact, back before I had a house, fiance' and dog, you could find me shopping just about as much as you could find me out drinking with friends and living it up. After all, I was the girl with nineteen pairs of jeans in rotation at any given time (picture this: I used to use my ghetto-booty as a tool to pick up men). Now, I'd rather pop open a bottle of red and chill by the fire with my main man and pup. Between you and me, not only am I surprised by this fact, but also shocked I'm actually willing to admit it.

One thing I'm having a particularly tough time grasping, however, is why the fun has been completely zapped from shopping. Now, I actually view this past-pasttime as a chore. Grocery shopping officially blows and I resort to my corner store for milk and bread more often than not. Clothing shopping gets continually difficult as I remain a 'tweener (not a girl, not yet a woman-willing-to-sport-mom-butt). And lately, I've been introduced to a new kind of shopping: Wedding Shopping.

I ask myself everyday how people managed to plan weddings before the Internet became mainstream. Having said that, I still find myself driving around town an awful lot lately, looking for some obscure and yet-found item I never thought I would ever need. Patina paint? Yes, please! A large flower-shaped paper punch? Don't mind if I do! Mother-of-the-Groom dresses by the boatload to bring Up North for an Easter weekend fashion show (my in-law's live in the sticks, and they like being stuck there)? Uh. Huh.

*sigh* I'm exhausted and I haven't even started gathering RSVP's yet. And don't even bring up the subject of putting together a seating chart because I'll cry, I swear I will!

My wedding planner has mentioned doing personal shopping for me, but I was previously too worried she wouldn't be prudent enough to weed out the tacky. Now? I might enlist her with the wise advice to simply step away from the gold and gaudy. Any advice for a harried wife-to-be? I'm a card-carrying lunatic, and I'm not afraid to use it...